Meghan Markle struggled to build relationships with her new family members after marrying Prince Harry in 2018, and her unusual approach to greeting the Royal Family left her feeling hurt
Meghan Markle was said to have had her feelings hurt after some members of the Royal Family “flinched” at her hugs. Insiders claim her “touchy-feeliness” caused some tension after she married Prince Harry in 2018.
Both Meghan and Harry have stated that Prince William and Kate found her love of hugging “jarring”, but now a royal expert has said it went even deeper in creating a “tense atmosphere”. Writing in his new book, Yes Ma’am: The Secret Life of Royal Servants – which has been excerpted in The Times – Tom Quinn said: “Tension developed between William and Harry as a result of Meghan’s warm, friendly, hug-everyone approach. Kate, William and Charles tended to flinch when she moved in for a hug.
“Meghan was understandably hurt, as everyone apparently hugs everyone in California. Meghan even tried to hug a singularly stiff Old Etonian equerry. He too flinched as if she’d tried to poke him in the eye, as another member of staff put it.”
William was said to have ‘flinched’ at Meghan’s hugs (
Image:
PA)
Tensions rose with Meghan and the rest of the Royal Family (
Image:
Getty Images)
The couple previously opened up about Meghan’s hugging in their Netflix docuseries, Harry & Meghan. Meghan said she did not know the Royal Family’s “formality” carries through behind closed doors and that she is a “hugger” – which she did not realise was “jarring for some Brits”.
She said: “Even when Will and Kate came over and I was meeting her for the first time I remember I was in ripped jeans, I was barefoot. Like I was a hugger, I have always been a hugger. I didn’t realise that is really jarring for a lot of Brits.
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“I started to understand that the formality on the outside carried through on the inside, that there is a forward facing way of being and then you close the door and think, ‘OK we can relax now’. But that formality carries over on both sides and that was surprising to me.'”
Harry also recalled the somewhat awkward first meeting between his now wife and his brother and sister-in-law in his bombshell memoir Spare. He claimed William “recoiled” from Meghan’s hug and described the moment he introduced his sibling to his then girlfriend as a “classic collision of cultures”.
“[It] completely freaked him out,” Harry wrote. “He recoiled. Willy didn’t hug many strangers. Whereas Meg hugged most strangers. Will had hoped that she would greet him with standard reverence per the protocol,” he added, “[but] she didn’t know it and I hadn’t told her.”
Traditionally, hugging is considered inappropriate for royals during official events, with a bow or curtsey being the preferred greeting. Harry has openly discussed his experience of limited physical affection within the Royal Family, including a lack of hugs during his childhood.
But it appears King Charles is leading the way in breaking this old-fashioned protocol. In September, Charles broke with tradition when he met the New Zealand Women Rugby Team, who made an unusual request.
“Yeah, we all wanted a hug,” Ayesha Leti-I’iga told the monarch, adding, “but only if it’s okay with you.” To the team’s surprise and delight, the King accepted, replying: “A hug? Why not!”
After the group embrace, which he joked was like being “flattened by a scrum”, Charles thanked the team for their “warm hug”, which he described as “very healing”.
Yes Ma’am: The Secret Life of Royal Servants by Tom Quinn is out on February 18.
