Pete Wicks has revealed the heartbreaking reason he quit Celebrity SAS: Who Dares Wins.
The Strictly Come Dancing star, 36, who was forced to leave the show in 2022 after he broke a rib jumping from a helicopter, left Channel 4 viewers in tears last night in emotional scenes. With his head bowed in defeat, he told instructors on the gruelling reality series: “I’ve lost the fight, I’ve got nothing left, my head is not in it”.
Now, Pete, who found fame on The Only Way Is Essex has lifted the lid on his exit as he admitted he “was in too deep” after being asked to read out a letter to his mum, who he almost lost to suicide.
Pete Wicks with his beloved mum, Tracy
Speaking to The Sun, he said: “I decided that night that I was in too deep. I hadn’t prepared for the reading out of the letters. I said things that I think I shouldn’t have said because I wasn’t saying it to the right person. I thought, ‘I need to go and say what I’ve said in this letter to my mum’.”
Pete added: “For them, it’s life and death. But it’s a TV show, and I’d reached my limit on a TV show. I’ve got absolutely no regrets about it.” When Pete made his debut on Strictly in September, he was cheered on by his beloved mum, Tracy, in the audience. The former TOWIE star has opened up about how he found his parent in their kitchen after she attempted suicide. In his new memoir, Pete tells how, terrified, he phoned his nan Doreen for help and then called an ambulance before trying to keep his mum alive.
Reliving the night, the star said: “I saw her sitting at the table, which had been covered in blood. I saw the blood dripping first. She was holding a knife in her other hand. Immediately, I ran over to her to take the knife from her hand. Before that, she had seemed almost possessed – it was like my mum had gone and someone (or something) else had taken over her body.”
In his book, Never Enough, Pete says the aftermath of the trauma affected him hugely as he became protective of Tracy. She raised him as a single mum with Doreen in Harlow, Essex, after she split from Pete’s dad when Pete was 11. But also he blamed himself.
He says: “I didn’t say it, but I believed it was my fault. I had been with Mum before it happened. I had agreed to go upstairs. I had stayed upstairs even though I could hear her wailing. If it was anyone’s fault, it was mine. Looking back, I know that my responsibility was probably overwhelming in that moment. I was the child, and I needed to be looked after. Instead, I had to look after my parent and suppress all the fear, panic, loneliness and self-blame that was beginning to grow inside me.”
Fortunately, Tracy made a fast recovery and was quickly out of hospital. She apologised to her son and said it was a “moment of madness” that would never happen again.
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