Selena Gomez Reveals She Contemplated Suicide & May Never Be Able To Have Children While Speaking On The Negative Impacts Of Her Bipolar Diagnosis

TV and film star Selena Gomez is getting candid about the realities of her long-term mental health situation.

During a recent interview, the 30-year-old entertainer shared how a 2018 mental breakdown left her taking several heavy medications. Selena Gomez said following the episode, she was officially diagnosed with bipolar disorder. The singer continued on to explain how the situation made her feel that she didn’t want to live anymore.

Selena Gomez

Speaking on the psychosis break prior to the official diagnosis, Gomez stated:
“I think when I started hitting my early twenties is when it started to get really dark, when I started to feel like I was not in control of what I was feeling, whether that was really great or really bad.”

She continued:
“It would start with depression, then it would go into isolation….Then it just was me not being able to move from my bed. I didn’t want anyone to talk to me. My friends would bring me food because they love me, but none of us knew what it was.”
The “Only Murderers In The Building” star then explained how depressive episodes made it hard to function on a day-to-day basis, eventually evolving into suicidal thoughts. She stated:

“Sometimes it was weeks I’d be in bed, to where even walking downstairs would get me out of breath…..I thought the world would be better if I wasn’t there,” 

Gomez revealed during the interview that in an effort to get help, she eventually checked into four different mental institutions. The Grammy-nominated singer said she barely recalls the time in her life, as she was heavily medicated and often felt “gone” from herself.

After checking into a Massachusetts clinic – hailed as one of the best in the states – Gomez shared things began looking up. The singer credits her psychiatrist for officially diagnosing her as bipolar, who subsequently prescribed only two medications that helped manage her condition. During the interview, she touched on the health professional and diagnosis:
“He really guided me….But I had to detox, essentially, from the medications I was on. I had to learn how to remember certain words. I would forget where I was when we were talking. It took a lot of hard work for me to (a) accept that I was bipolar, but (b) learn how to deal with it because it wasn’t going to go away.”

 

While things have been better for the musician, Gomez also spoke on the downsides of the medication. The singer revealed she became emotional once visiting a friend with children, thinking about how difficult childbirth would be for her personally. Reportedly, bipolar medication comes with a slew of potentially harmful pregnancy side effects – including heart defects and developmental delay. However, Gomez noted that she is hopeful she’ll one day become a mother. She stated:
“That’s a very big, big, present thing in my life….However I’m meant to have them, I will.” 
Selena’s coming, documentary debuting on Apple TV this Friday (November 4th), will reportedly give further detail on living with bipolar disorder.

[VIA]